Epiphany and Confession Time!!!

TODAY is the game changer. TODAY is the day that has changed the way I’ll lead the “rest of my life”.

And all it took was this one post by Steve Blank.

I quit the supposed “rat race” to follow my dreams but I never realized that the rat race never quit me. And this post is about an entrepreneur’s confession.

The long hours at my previous work places always left me feeling extremely empty - a void that I could never explain. Entrepreneurship shouldn’t have been such a natural choice that it eventually turned out to be. After all, there isn’t a drop of business in my blood - in fact, a secure, well paying job should’ve been my priority no. 1. It wasn’t.

And boy, was I glad that my family supported my decision to throw away a fast track career and jump into unchartered waters. The day I quit my globe-trotting, offensively well paying job, I had absolutely no money in my bank accounts. I never cared too much about saving - I wanted and had it all - new cars, a small penthouse apartment, fine dining on weekends. My decision to quit meant quite a few sacrifices. I thought it would be heart-breaking to let it all go. And once again, it wasn’t. If I remember right, I even agreed to forgo one month’s salary in exchange for being relieved without having to serve out my notice period.

The first few months are always magical, sometimes completely unbelievable. It is a high that one cannot explain but only experience. Every day brings new ideas - days turn into nights and the conversations continue well into the next day. The adrenalin rush is completely overpowering. Like every good fairy tale, life has its mandatory twists - one needs to be able to take the punches without being knocked down. In the life of an entrepreneur, the tough days heavily outnumber good ones. However, the good days more than make up for the struggle. So we do what we should - work harder, work smarter, work longer.

All was well till I read the afore mentioned post. One more thing that all aspiring entrepreneurs should know before I continue is that one tends to lose the ability to tolerate criticism, esp. from people who really care. That combined with ever-changing goal posts and deadlines can overwhelm the best of us.

Armed with the power of my latest epiphany, I did some some honest soul searching. Sacrifices were made not just by me but by every single person who loves and cares about me.

The long hours are no different from the times before my startup. The constant stretch was not only pushing my limits but of the people around me as well. In the last few years, I’ve never found time for family, friends and even my loving wife. All I had was a ready list of excuses for not being there. I was so consumed by my drive that I was completely oblivious to the fact that time was fast running out. Earlier I could blame it all on my employer, boss and sometimes even clients. But today …? All my claims of making up for the lost time sound so hollow now.

It is also very easy to take everything and everyone around you for granted while chasing that pot of gold. Families are not just your source of support but also an easy target of your anger and frustration. Most of us (including yours truly) wrongly interpret patience - patience does not mean tolerance - its just a rope, a very long one. Never try to push your luck too hard. I did - thankfully my rope was long enough.

Justifying the toll your ambition takes on the family is something that every single entrepreneur I’ve known in my life does. Its almost natural to fool yourself into believing that this grunt is for the greater good of your family and the generations ahead. Not for a moment did I realize before today that my family would rather have 1 hour of my daily life than a year of “quality time” on an exotic island.

So, my friends, stop making excuses for not spending enough time with your loved ones. If it means sacrificing an hour’s sleep to wake up early to go for that morning walk, do it. If it means turning off the laptop to chat about the day, do it. Do everything possible to enjoy life in the moment - you never know, tomorrow may just be too late.

I promise to turn my life around - DO YOU?

UPDATE: I’m still an entrepreneur (some people were concerned). I just need to find some balance. And the quest for the holy grail continues…

Cafe Coffee Day - Seriously?!

This is very disturbing. I had visited the Coffee Day outlet on Commercial Street last Sunday to meet a friend. When we ordered a couple of cold coffees, the waiter offered the familiar choice of whipped cream, ice-cream and chocolate sauce. Since all that we wanted was a glass of cold coffee on a very hot afternoon, we declined.

Then came the shocker, the waiter informed us that they don’t serve cold coffee without the “extras” on weekends. Incredible!

After haggling for a while, we settled for the extras to be served on a plate. In one swift stroke, CCD lost years of brand equity that they’d built with me. Forced up-selling never worked and probably never will. Siddhartha and Co - didn’t really expect smart people like you to do this. No wonder, the outlet was a ghost town on a crowded Sunday. CCD, SHAME ON YOU!

Update (IIT/IIM: National Shame)

A big thanks to everyone for responding so passionately. Let me reiterate once again - the post was not meant to provoke but highlight the fact that we are celebrating something that we shouldn’t be proud of. The reason why its a lot tougher to get into IIT/IIM than Harvard or MIT is because people there have a wider choice of top schools.

I don’t intend to be prescriptive in any of my posts. I got a lot of responses from people who argued about everything from public policy to pedagogy and legislation. Some of the responses were completely off the mark and argued against current legislations like reservation and other affirmative actions. My personal opinion about this subject (though it may only be tangentially related to the current post) is that no nation can progress without taking the entire nation along - even if it means a couple of generations have to make sacrifices for a greater future, so be it. After all, we’ve been independent for less than 62 years - Americans were hunting each other down 60 years after their declaration of independence. Once again, this is a very contentious subject and I would rather leave it alone.

I request everyone who has sent me mails to post their views on the blog - the comments section is not moderated - so feel free to candidly comment.

IIT/IIM: National Shame!

Let me add a disclaimer right at the outset: This post is not intended to be provocative and I definitely do not want to be drawn into a lengthy debate.

My earliest brush with the word IIM was in primary school when my father, an employee in a public sector company, spoke about the time he first stood outside the gates of IIM (Bangalore) many years before his marriage. That image got stuck in my mind and there were many nights when I tried visualizing what my father had described - I wanted to feel the same awe. I got my chance not much later when one fine day, sometime during my middle or high school, my father decided to take me to IIM(B) on his 50CC moped. After what seemed like a very long journey, we reached the imposing gates and a huge signage with the words Indian Institute of Management, Bangalore. After a quick chat with the security head, we walked in. I don’t remember how many hours we spent walking around the campus but it was late evening by the time we started our ride back. The return journey seemed a lot shorter - I was just not in my senses. It was a kind of high that I’ve experienced very few times after that (the latest when I was getting my married to my wonderful wife). I was hooked - and from that day forward, all I wanted to do was to force my way through those gates.

Fast forward a few years - I was peer-pressurized into joining a couple of coaching classes for the IIM entrance examination (CAT). That is when the sheer magnitude of what I wanted hit me. The classes used to be packed with extremely bright people - all fighting for the few hundred seats on offer. I loved and hated the challenge equally. Something didn’t feel right even though the competitor in me reveled.

Cut to a couple of years ahead - I was sitting in my room in one of the IIMs and surfing through the articles online when I was sent a link by one of my classmates. The link pointed to an article in “The Economist” which had rated my B-School as the toughest in the world to get into. The primary criterion was the ratio of applicants to seats. On an average there were close to 70,000 “serious applicants” for less than 200 seats. The ratio has jumped many times recently with close to 200,000 competing for around 250 odd seats. The whole school was celebrating - I was saddened.

I come from a place where there is a huge premium on education. Families make many sacrifices to provide good education to the kids. My thoughts wandered to my classmates at the CAT coaching centre - what made me special? Does just a fraction of a percentile point make me better? I thought not.

Last night while catching up on the day’s news, I came across this story about IIT entrance examination results on NDTV 24/7 where the news anchor mentions (or was it proudly declares) that getting into an IIT is tougher than getting into Harvard or MIT. That took me back to the time when I was sitting in my room and feeling guilty at being a student at a “top of the line” B-School.

What were we celebrating? SCARCITY?

The years that followed my graduation from IIM thoroughly alarmed me - the government with its shoddy and short-sighted attempts at making quality education available to all and the IIMs trying preserve their “exclusivity”. Both made extremely hollow statements - while the government failed to convincingly present their case, the IIMs took refuge under the argument that they were protesting against “dilution in the quality of education”.

If a nation of over 1.2 billion people does not have the faculty to man atleast 100 IIMs and 100 IITs, then this country shouldn’t have been posting almost double digit growth rates over the last few years. Frankly speaking, I have come across many lecturers and professors during my under-graduation days who were at par with those from IIMs.

Exclusivity/elitism is discrimination and a denial of choice. With such a large youth population, this country could definitely do with a few hundred IITs and IIMs. The only way to turbo-charging this country’s growth and changing the fate of a nation is by giving the choice of quality education to all. So what if we don’t win awards from The Economist? Why not standardize and implement the IIT/IIM-way of education across the country? Why not follow the hiring processes of IITs/IIMs for all universities across the country? If an applicant with 98.3 percentile points deserves to be in an IIM, so does someone who missed out with a 98.2 percentile - or for that matter an applicant with 97 or 96 percentile.

So lets stop this sham of celebrating scarcity and elitism in the garb preserving quality. This is the last thing a young nation on the path of endless possibilities needs. Lets march on!

UPDATE: Please read this too!

Watching the news now - got an idea for a blog post - something that I’ve felt very strongly about for a few years now - details to follow!